Men Tell Their Secrets...

Men Tell Their Secrets

​I'm fascinated at how couples work.  What makes two people stick it out to make a relationship work.  What is it about one person over another that makes men decide to commit to that one person for the rest of their life? So, I've been asking married men "What's the secret to a happy marriage?" for months now, and  I've pulled out a select few to share with you and I think you'll find their answers compelling, emotional, funny and heart-warming.  So without further ado and in no particular order, I give you Men's Secret to a Happy Marriage...


Mark M.  Married 24 years:
"I married my high school sweet heart.  I'd say it would have to be patience.  On both our parts."

Pete L.  Married 53 years:
"It's a give and take.  Lord knows I'm not perfect.  We take it one day at a time.  One day at a time."

Ken E.  Married 26 years:
"Suffering through chicken night with a smile on my face for twenty-six years!"

Matt C.  Married 7 years:
"Having kids.  Seeing that it's a bit of each of you; you created them, together.  It makes you want to try harder."

Bill W.  Married 40 years:
"Don't sweat the small stuff and it all ends up being small stuff."

Jeff O.  Married 31 years:
"Be intentional.  Make her a priority."

Harmon C.  Married 38 years:
"I don't make any decisions without her.  (I basically do what she tells me to do!)  It took me about twenty years to figure that out."

Bill J.  Married 27 years:
"Wait.  Don't get married until you're WAY out of adolescence.  I waited until I was thirty-six.  Then, just take it one day at a time."

Mark M.  Married 26 years:
"When it comes to money, come to a mutual agreement.  Listen.  Not just listen, but hear her.  And... don't make sports THE top priority!"

Larry S.  Married 51 years:
"Always put her first.  Make sure her needs are taken care of.  She does the same for me."

John S.  Married 42 years:
"Have the same religious base... and forgiveness.  You're going to make a lot of mistakes.  Forgiveness is a must.

Russ I.  Married 6 years:
"Find someone that will put up with you!"

Jim L.  Married 52 years:
"Just keep saying 'Yes Dear'!"

Bill H.  Married 43 years:
"Communication... and don't lie.  She tells me everything and I  tell her everything.  You can lie to anyone else, but don't lie to each other.  That's the fastest way to lose trust.  I know I can trust her about anything and she trusts that I will always be there for her."

Thirudathi R.  Married 30 years:
"Trust.  Trust is the key."

Dave H.  Married 55 years:
"She's always right!"

Kevin N.  Married 39 years:
"The minister said till death do us part.  That means for the good and bad.  So, that was that."

Ulli H.  Married 35 years:
"Trust.  If you cross that line, you can't go back."

Jerry D.  Married 54 years:
"Always love each other.  No matter what.  And learn to compromise."

Knowles T.  Married 39 years:
"I believe in communicating and sticking it out through thick and thin and forgiving."

Bob O.  Married 27 years:
"Compromise.  It's not so much about me but rather 'us'.  Pay her a compliment every day.  It costs little but it means so much."

Ken G.  Married 49 years:
"Tolerance. And let me tell you that when you work so hard at being tolerant in your marriage, you're allowed to be LESS tolerant in other areas.  Mine is driving.  I go so irritated with ignorant drivers!  Especially in traffic!"

David O.  Married 55 years:
"Patience.  Love and patience."

Matt M.  Married 20 years:
"Respect each other."

John K.  Married 38 years:
"The wife rules!! But other than that, I think openness and honesty." 

Martin V.  Married 5 years:
"Wait fifty years!  I wasn't going to be a statistic, so I waited for the right one.  It was lonely, and I thought I was going to be a bachelor forever and then I met her."

Charles E.  Married 14 years:
"Know when to shut up."

BONUS QUESTION:
A few were kind enough to answer a bonus question for me...
How did you know she was the one?

John K:  Married 38 years:
"We dated for five years.  I don't know, it was just... a feeling."

Martin V.  Married 5 years:
"We met at a group meeting for people who have seizures.  And I loved her personality."

Thirudathi R.  Married 30 years:
"We went to school together.  I really liked her.  We were just on the same frequency.  I went to my father and asked if I could marry her and he arranged it.  We started as friends that turned into love." (He comes from India and their marriages are usually arranged for them.)

Bill H.  Married 43 years:
"We lived in the same neighborhood and I even delivered the newspaper to her house.  But we didn't go out on a date until after we graduated.  I tried to fight it.   I didn't want to settle down, but everyone else knew she was the one.  I got sent away for a few months because of my job, and I just didn't want to be without her.  Or worse, I didn't want her to find somebody else!  Finally, I didn't want to fight it any more."

Russ I.  Married 6 years:
(See his above comment!)  "She put up with me!"

John S.  Married 42 years:
"She told me!  But seriously, I was in the service and we were separated for three months.  I couldn't stand it.  I was only eighteen and had to have my mom sign for permission to allow me to get married!  I got leave and we got married.  We haven't been separated since."


Thank you gentlemen for talking with me and being able to offer up these insights to my readers.  I love hearing everyone's stories, and I'd love to hear yours too!  Do you have a secret to share?  What's the secret to your happy relationship and how did you know that your mate was "the one"?  

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