The Spring Photo Shoot is complete and I think we can call it a success!  The weather was absolutely beautiful and everyone was in a great mood and we even managed to get some good shots!

This photo shoots purpose was to get an author photo for the upcoming release of my second Christian-fiction novel, Waiting for the Sun that comes out on May 20th.  But it should also give me some good publicity photos for any number of other things coming up.  The pictures with the quotes on them seem to do really well and get shared quite often, so I get a lot of feedback from them.  With the back drop of some of these photos, (they were taken at the Missouri Botanical Gardens!  80 acres of beautifulness!!) they are perfect for some quotes I've got laying around!! Lol  And lastly, the website needed a little cleaning up so some of the pictures will be featured there as well.  A little bit of me splashed all over the place! 

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank my make-up artist, Mary Spezia.  She is my go-to girl when it comes to my face and hair.  She takes really good care of me and always knows the "look" I am going for.  She is patient and funny and is always ready for a touch-up.  She is not afraid to hold up the process if she doesn't think I look "just right"!  And I love her for that!!

Also, thank you to Iramil Kneemiller for assisting my awesome photographer and for making sure the was set up right, my arm was in the right spot and the wrinkles were pulled out before any film was wasted!

And my photographer, Shaun Kneemiller.  I love working with this man!  He is so very talented and has such a brilliant eye.  While his wife and my make-up artist were making me fabulous, he was patient and would fill his time taking pictures of other things around us.  (Which turned out amazing as well!!)  He is destined for great things in the photography world and I am honored to be able to say that I found him first!!  We work together so well and I only have to describe an idea and he is off and running with it.  I am so happy that he takes the time out of his busy schedule for me.

So, back to this whole author photo thing... I am asking for help in choosing the actual photo that will be used on the back cover of the book.  So, if you are so inclined to add your opinion, I would be most grateful.  You'll be able to see the photos revealed one at a time on Facebook (Elizabeth Bourgeret- Author or EBourgeret), twitter (EBourgeret), google+ (+ElizabethBourgeret) or instagram (EBourgeret) all next week.  If you could let me know what you think by leaving a comment or sharing or liking, I can narrow down the choices.  I love having your opinions!  

So, follow me on the social media outlets and let me know what you think of Shaun's handiwork!!  I am so grateful to have people around me that love me and encourage me!  Thank you to everyone that helps Elizabeth Bourgeret be all that I am supposed to be!!

Build Your Community

​Do you believe the statement:  You are the average of the five people you hang around with the most?

I have differing feelings on the statement.  While I feel that it is good to be around people that will encourage and motivate you.  You are responsible to make the best choices for yourself and shouldn't let those around you have that much of an influence in your decisions.  Like if you have to make a choice for a new job.  You'd appreciate the opinions of those around you, but the final choice is yours.  You are not SO influenced by your peers (as an adult anyway... I hope) that you would just follow blindly by what your fave five would say.  And if, for instance, your circle of people make choices to go out and party when you know you have to work first thing in the morning, the choice is still yours to go out or not and they will most likely still be your friends in the morning.  However, if those same people continue in that same behavior on a regular basis and you are trying to become something else, it may be better to put some space between you and this set of friends.

I'm sure it goes without saying that you should not be friends or hang out with people who are toxic or continue to be a drain on you.  If spending time with certain people brings you down, even if it is family, sometimes, it's better not to spend that time with them.  Life is too short to spend it with people that are going to suck the fun out of it for you!  I understand that you have family obligations but you are only required to love your family, you don't necessarily have to like them.  Especially if they spend too much time tearing you down instead of lifting you up, using you instead of being there for you, or finding fault with you instead of seeing your qualities.

Do you find yourself around people who's favorite pastime is complaining or criticizing others?  They fall into the "toxic" category as well.  When people constantly complain, they drain the energy from the room.  And even if you are a strong minded person, sometimes their negativity can spread into your system before you even know it.  Then suddenly, you are looking at things from a glass half empty perspective and don't realize it until you've gotten away from that environment.  It's happened to me.  I've let the other negative people in the room completely throw off my happy mood.  It happened so quickly that I didn't realize it until I started hearing the toxins coming from my own mouth!  Guard your emotions!! 

Be careful not to become a toxic person yourself!  Don't make other people have to choose to stay away from you because you make them sad or feel unappreciated.  Here's some quick questions for you: Do you try to find the silver lining?  Can you see the good things in people?  Is there always another way to try something, do something, see something?  If you answered yes, you're probably doing alright. 

Try to surround yourself with positive, up-beat, encouraging people.  People that will show you new ways to be better at something.  People that will take you to the next level on the path you are following.  Choose to learn from people who have done what you want to do.  Create your tribe of like-minded, people.

Someone once said, "Never be the smartest person in the room.  If you are, find new friends or find a new room!"  Always keep learning and growing.  Surround yourself with loving and nourishing people.  If you can't find someone you can actually, physically be around, use the internet and all of its wonderful social media to find wisdom and encouragement.  Follow the people that you admire or have the careers that you strive for.  Learn from the best!

So, do I agree with the above statement?  I can see some validity in it, but I do have some people in my circle that aren't the "best" people for me, but I may be the "best" people for them... and I love them.  Only tolerate what you can tolerate and not an ounce more.  If the scale tipped to the side that I felt I was not being helpful to them or they taxed my emotion too much, I would definitely make space between us.  I can't support others who only want to tear down.  It makes me sad and it's against every thing I believe in.  Don't be around people that make you unhappy.  It may be a difficult decision to step away from them and go out on your own, but you will be happier for it in the long run.  
I think it is better to say- have balance.  Know what your limits are and what/who could influence you and use that rule when you decide who to make a priority in your life.  Be happy.  Live, Love and Learn.

So, what is your opinion of Jim Rohn's Rule of 5?  Leave your comments below!

Crossroads

​I don't know what I'm afraid of.  I've been here before... at the crossroads.  But every time I make my way to this point, I am stricken with fear.  Choices.  Go right?  Go left? Go straight?  ... go back?  What if it's the wrong choice?

I am standing at the crossroads.  I can see the choices before me... and that familiar fear creeps up my throat and makes it hard to breathe.  I am deathly afraid of failure. 

Its actually a ridiculous circle of events, I work and work and work so hard just to get me to this point and then I am freaked out when I get here.  And one of two things is going to happen...  Either, I will push ahead and give it my all and will face whatever outcome results from it, or subconsciously sabotage the project so that when I fail I have something to blame it on.  Is it sad that I can literally SEE my two choices before me?

This is a big one.  It's not like changing the color of my livingroom walls or even buying a new car.  My choices in front of me are life changing.  If I fail at this, it will knock me back quite a few notches.  Sure, I've been there before, at the bottom of the failure pile ... but I don't like it.  I realize that sometimes you have to fail before you can succeed, and I could really use a success.

If you've been following my blogs, you have seen how I am shifting slightly in my niche.  I am turning my focus to teens and family coaching and diving in head first into the workshops and seminars.  I have peace about my decision right up until the time I have to take action on it.  So I've done all the small things, the research, the writing, the connections, the announcements... but now, it's actually time to do it.  It's time to offer my first workshop.  It's time to suck it up and start making videos for on-line seminars and the blogs, etc.  It's time to make the new website go live.  It's time to put the wheels in motion.
Scary stuff...  Scary, scary stuff...

So, this is me where I am at this juncture of my writing career.  Thank you for letting me share my trials with you and thank you for your prayers and kind words.  I know the direction I need to follow.  I am standing in the crossroads, but I know the direction I need to take.  It's just a matter of taking that first step.
Maybe tomorrow.... yes, definitely tomorrow.

Let It Go

​Your blog post today is a product of the magical, distracting power of Disney.  I've been trying to work on helping you to let go of your past troubles so they don't weigh down your future.  And Disney's Frozen song keeps running through my head, "Let It Go." Excellent advice.    "... the past is in the past..."  While I will try to keep my singing to a minimum, there is some important and valuable keys to be learned here.

We all make mistakes.  No one is perfect.  We have all made painful decisions that we wish we hadn't.  No one is free from that.  No one.  I wish I could take the pain away that is associated with your past, the fact is that it happened that way for a reason.  You hopefully learned something; grew from your mistakes, and if that's the case-  Good for you.  Because you have learned to make your stumbling block your stepping stone.  You are who you are today, because of the things in your past- good or bad.

But for the others who are carrying around guilt, self-loathing, bitterness and anger, I am here to say let it go.  You are dragging your past into your future where it was not meant to be.  There is nothing so big that you cannot be forgiven for (Acts 10:43), but the one you need forgiveness from in most cases is yourself.  Let it go...

Your brain is a powerful thing.  It obeys what you tell it to do.  When you put it on auto-pilot, it can dredge up some painful images and show them to you over and over again allowing them to tell yourself things that just aren't true.  "You weren't good enough for her."  "You aren't smart enough to get into that college."  "You deserve to unhappy."  "You have done some bad, bad things."  Every time you replay those images, they get a little bit stronger.  They take over a little more of your thought process.  Your brain is SO amazing that not only will it display those images, but it can cause you to evoke the emotions that go right along with it.  So if you think on it, real hard, it's like the same painful thing is happening again, right now, making those memories and wounds fresh again.  

Is that really where you want to be?  Do you really want to punish yourself over and over again for something that you can do absolutely nothing about?  You can't change the past.  You can't un-do anything that has already happened.  But you can make choices for your future. Did you know that your brain will also do what you tell it to do?  You don't have to be at the mercy of your memories.  When those thoughts come at you, make the conscious effort to change the channel. You don't have to let those memories have control over you.  Change the channel.  

Quit thinking about it.

Quit talking about it.

Quit replaying the disappointments.

Quit reliving the hurt and the bad choices.

When you can't close the doors on the past, you are practically locking the doors to your future.  You know the saying, when one door closes, another will open.  Well the new door can't open if you haven't closed the old door!  Your future can't truly begin if you're still lugging around the pain from your yesterdays.  Change your future by taking control of your thoughts and letting the past stay in the past.  Those thoughts WILL come up again, but you have to choose to guard your thoughts.  Keep moving forward. 

It doesn't matter where you were born.  It doesn't matter how you were raised.  It doesn't matter if he/she left you.  It doesn't matter if you didn't get the job.  You are not a victim.

How long are you going to blame outside events for your shortcomings?  How long are you going to mourn for your losses?  When is it time to turn things around and take on the future that you really and truly want?  I'm not dismissing the things that have happened to you.  But we have all had things, bad things, happen in our lives that we wish didn't happen.  You still have a choice!  Let go of the victim mentality.  Let go of the bitterness.  Let go of the anger, the hate and the anguish.  Let go of the ashes so you can see the beauty.

Sometimes not getting what you thought you wanted is the blessing in and of itself.  If it was meant to be, then it would be.  You are not your past.  You can't change your yesterdays, but you do have some input on all of your tomorrows.  Use your powerful brain to see where it is that you want to be in your future.  See the things that make you happy.  Focus on the ones that you love and love you in return.  

At some point, we have to decide when to let go.  You've done all you can do.  Nothing else is going to change for the better.  You have to come to terms that it is over and done.  We may not ever understand how we came to this point,  "but here I stand, in the light of day" and you have to decide to move past it.  If you continue to hang on, it will only drag you down.  Let it go.  Cut off the dead weight and feel the heaviness come off your shoulders.  It is not until you acknowledge the end that a new beginning can start.  It is where you are unwilling to walk away, that you will be forever stuck.  You can't go backwards.  You weren't meant to go back.  You have a whole new life waiting for you to live it if you will just give it a chance.

Every morning is a clean canvas.  A new chance to start over.  Unlock the doors to your future.  Change the channel.  Forgive your past.  Let it go.  

Forgive those who have hurt you.

Forgive the man that broke your heart.

Forgive the woman that wouldn't give you a chance.

Forgive the boss who passed you over for the promotion.

Forgive the circumstances that led to pain or feelings of unjust.

Forgive yourself.

Forgive.  Whether it was something that happened ten minutes ago or ten years ago.  Forgive.

This does not mean that your life will be easy.  There will be new trials and temptations and painful events that will blindside you, just repeat.  Forgive and let it go.

Isaiah 43:18-19 “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."