How Do You React?

Photo by Shaun Kneemiller

How Do You React?

​We all have pain.  We all suffer loss.  We all have to go through experiences that we'd rather avoid.  The question is, how do you react when you are faced with unpleasantries?

We have no control over the things that life is going to throw at us.  Sometimes it seems as if we are being "picked on" by the universe or God or whomever you choose to blame.  When the truth is, we all have our fair share.  Some people get it dumped on them all at one time, others have a constant stream of disappointment, still others have it dispersed through out life at an even pace so as barely to disrupt their daily activity.

How can this be?  I believe it is how we react to these events that determines the radius of destruction it plays in our lives.  How you react places the value on the negative event.  Is it going to shut you down?  Move you to a cardboard box in an alley?  Is every event catastrophic? Or can you get through it with a few minor tweaks?  Is it something you have to work a little harder to push through?  Or something that would turn out better if you just lay low for a while?  Grief and tragedy affects each one of us in different ways.  Learn to know your telltale behavior when times get rough to learn if you need to alter a few things to make life easier, you stronger, thicker skinned, or whatever the change might have to be.

I do not belittle any tragedy that goes on in people's lives.  God knows, I've had plenty to try and keep me down.  The Devil loves to challenge my faith on a regular basis.  And yet...

The doctors of the medical community have diagnosed me with clinical manic depression.  Which, basically gives me permission to have crying jags, eating binges and months of solitude and a list of medications to choose from if I so desire.  Because of this condition, I have the green light to turn my heartbreaks, my letdowns, my bumps in the road, my catastrophes of any size to take control over my life, my emotions and my well-being.  Well, guess what...

I choose not to let the weight of the world control my destiny!

Let alone my month, my week, my days.  Okay,  sometimes... many times it can have an hour or two, but then it's time to get back up and get back to life.

Being diagnosed with depression, means that I sometimes have to work harder to see the sunshine instead of the rain, but since I know that about myself, I know what I have to do.  It isn't easy.  Like I said, I have permission by the professionals to sit around in my pajamas for days on end and wallow.  But that's not the kind of life that I want.

I choose to keep the sunshine on my face so the shadows stay behind me. I am not in denial.  When these bad things come up, I make a choice as how to deal with them.  I do my best not to make mountains out of molehills.  I don't let gossip or what others think of me take a hold of my life or alter me.  

I know, that I am being the best person I can be under any circumstance.

So, how do you react?  When bad things happen, do you let it sink in and take over?  Complaining doesn't help.  Constantly bringing it to the surface doesn't help.  Gossiping, or using the feel-sorry-for-me-card doesn't help.  Don't discuss your problems with others unless they can help you.  Either by support, or getting you through the situation.  By constantly telling everyone how miserable you are only makes you a whiner.  Enough of the reality tv show attitude.  Your dirty laundry wasn't meant to be scattered all over the front yard.  I'm not saying hide it.  But I'm saying don't flaunt it.  I'm not saying pretend everything is fine when it isn't, I'm suggesting reserving your comments on the situation for specific people.  People that can help you and have your best interests at heart. 

Like I said, what life throws at us is out of our control.  But you can make it three times worse if you give in to pressure, or depression, or bullying, or grief, or brick walls.  There is ALWAYS another way.  There is ALWAYS another choice.

Choose the sunshine.... Always choose the sunshine.

---