I have gotten such a great response to the question I put out, "What is the most important aspect of a lasting relationship" This question went out to the masses and people from all stages in their relationship walks responded. Those who were in long, committed relationships told me their secret for keeping it and those in other stages told me what they believed they wanted most. It, as with all my surveys and questions, has been a fascinating and educational experience!
What had started out to be a simple two or three paragraph piece, your responses have overwhelmingly stated that you need more information, because empty relationships no longer satisfy your long term needs. You, my friend, are looking for a long lasting relationship! Your comments have told me in not so many terms that you need more information about how to make that happen!
I, too, have been looking for the secret that makes a marriage so lasting and fulfilling, and by talking with all these people, I think I'm on to something. I am learning from other people's experiences. This, I believe is how you grow. Learn from others who have succeeded in the areas in which you want to succeed. It takes far too much time to personally experience everything. So I am sharing what I am learning so you can find lasting love too.
More than 200 people have already participated and hopefully several more will offer feed back to this next section of research. I have narrowed it down to 10 main components.
Trust, Commitment, Intimacy, Communication, Honesty, Hearing/Saying the words "I love you", Passion, Respect, Compatibility, and God- Centered. I didn't make a category for the obvious "Love" because as each component grows stronger, love grows deeper.
Each of these components individually or in any random assortment could make you happy in a relationship for some time, but I am beginning to believe that you really do need all of them for something truly lasting. Impossible? I'm finding out that no, it's not impossible. Easy? No. Not at all. Love, as it turns out, is a lot less magical that I might have thought. It seems, as with anything of any value, you have to work at it. There is a process that makes this crazy- little- thing- called- love last. I'm here to find it.
So please follow me on facebook at Elizabeth Bourgeret- Author for more questions to come because I need your quotes and comments!!
By the way, Trust was the number one answer. And only one person said sex. (Which is important, but fits nicely under the Intimacy category) But I found it interesting that most people would still be content with their life-partner even if they had to give up sex as long as they had the other components.
Stay tuned for more to come and the final article series aptly titled, The Ten Components of a Lasting Relationship